| You'll often find in antenatal classes that the | | | | of the way. She will often hide her face or close |
| teacher will be very confident in telling you that | | | | her eyes which is great. Try not to interupt her |
| "the role of the birthing partner is very important". | | | | or get her attention while she is doing this. Do not |
| And that's where they often stop; no tips, no | | | | openly watch your partner or tell her how she |
| advice, just the statement that you are very | | | | looks/ sounds/ appears as this will get her brain |
| important! So if you are so important, how do | | | | thinking and cause her to come out of her 'animal', |
| you know if you're doing your 'job' correctly or if | | | | meditative state. However much you want to talk |
| there is in fact a 'job' for you to do as your | | | | to your partner about how things are going try |
| partner breathes deeply and focuses on her | | | | and refrain from doing so. The only reason you'll |
| contractions? | | | | be doing this is for your own good and will not |
| It is true that a birthing partner's role is very | | | | help her. If she wants to talk try not to |
| important, but not essential. A woman can safely | | | | encourage her by getting into conversation with |
| give birth without a 'team' around her and would | | | | each other. Conversation will get her out of the |
| often be much safer to give birth alone in privacy. | | | | relaxed and meditative state her body will |
| If a woman decides to have you with her for the | | | | naturally put her in to. Answer any questions with |
| birth of her baby it is essential for the health of | | | | very simple positive language and a kind smile. |
| both mother and child that you understand and | | | | Sometimes during labour, a woman who's in her |
| carry out your role effectively. | | | | 'animal' mind (the best way to increase the |
| The three main things to remember about your | | | | hormones and have a great and easier labour) will |
| role as a birthing partner is tostay relaxedbecome | | | | say and do some strange things. Talking gibberish |
| invisible andkeep the space safe | | | | and making strange noises and movements are |
| I will explain each one of these in turn. | | | | great and you can rest and relax knowing that |
| Staying relaxed during the birth of the baby is as | | | | she's labouring really well. Remember to stay |
| much the role of the birthing partner as it is for | | | | invisible and do not comment on any of this |
| the woman in labour. If you are feeling anxious, | | | | behaviour. |
| irritable, restless, worried or aggitated, excited or | | | | Keeping the space safe during the labour and birth |
| even hungry you will increase your levels of | | | | means a lot more than making sure cables are |
| adrenaline (the fight or flight hormone that raises | | | | out of the way and the birthing pool water is the |
| your blood pressure and gives you a boost of | | | | right temperature. Keeping the space safe means |
| energy). Adrenaline is a very contagious hormone, | | | | ensuring that the birth process is respected and |
| the effects can produce responses in those | | | | kept uninterrupted. By being invisible and relaxed |
| around you. During labour, if anyone has adrenaline | | | | you are keeping the space safe. By ensuring the |
| pumping through them it can mean, for the | | | | rest of the people in the birthing room are doing |
| mother, that it is not safe for her to give birth | | | | likewise is also keeping the space safe. Many |
| and so labour may slow down or even go | | | | midwives and doctors either don't know or don't |
| backwards. Oxytocin, the hormone responsible for | | | | understand the true birth process or don't see the |
| labour contractions, will decrease or not be | | | | importance of keeping it in tact. |
| released if adrenaline is in the body. It is possible | | | | Interrupting the simple process of birth by |
| for a womans' cervix to contract from fully | | | | watching the labouring woman, trying to get her |
| dilated to 7, maybe even 6cm if the situation is | | | | thinking and answering questions, making |
| not safe for her and baby. Sometimes the baby | | | | comments that will make her feel self conscious, |
| will not come down the birth canal and labour | | | | self pitying or fearful, keeping the lights bright or |
| suddenly stops if there's too much tension and | | | | trying to get her to change positions and coaching |
| adrenalin in the room. | | | | her to breathe or push will all have a negative |
| So how do you relax when you're about to | | | | impact on the ease of the birth. Having a foetal |
| become a father, grandfather, grandmother, aunt | | | | monitor strapped to the labouring woman is also a |
| or uncle? Read a book, try and sleep or practise | | | | source of observation and acts in the same way |
| meditating are all great ways to relax during | | | | as someone sitting infront of her staring. Ask if it |
| childbirth. Leaving the room if you're feeling | | | | is possible for the midwife to use a dopler (a hand |
| anxious is the best way to unwind and relax. You'll | | | | held instrument that listens to the baby's heart |
| greatly benefit your partner if you are not | | | | beat) as this can be much less intrusive. The baby |
| present at times when you're not coping with the | | | | knows when it is being observed and may |
| situation so you can regain perspective and come | | | | become distressed with a constant machine |
| back feeling refreshed and calm. Try and stay | | | | monitoring him/her. |
| away from tea and coffee during the labour | | | | It is your job, as the birthing partner, to ensure |
| (especially because the smell of coffee can be | | | | that there are only the essential people in the |
| very strong) as these drinks increase your | | | | birthing room; the woman in labour, a midwife (not |
| adrenalin. | | | | necessarily all the time) and yourself (also not |
| The first stage of labour, where the woman's | | | | necessarily all the time). Obstetrician's sometimes |
| body is opening and stretching to allow the baby | | | | like to come in to introduce themselves. You are |
| to come down far enough for her to start | | | | allowed to ask them to leave or request that |
| pushing, is very boring for those who are not | | | | they do not enter the room if everything is going |
| feeling the contractions. The contractions will | | | | fine as the more people in the room the less |
| come and go at five to three or less minute | | | | privacy there is and the birthing woman should be |
| intervals which can go on healthily for over 24 | | | | left to relax and focus on herself and the baby. |
| hours. If you cannot find a way to relax through | | | | The more a woman in labour is able to focus |
| this phase of labour you're going to have a very | | | | purely on herself and the baby, the quicker and |
| uncomfortable wait! Childbirth is about being | | | | easier the birth. Your role is to create the space |
| patient and relaxing into whatever unfolds for | | | | for that to happen. |
| however long it takes. Practise relaxation and | | | | As an add on to your role, the birthing partner |
| being still on a regular basis for at least four | | | | acts as a voice for the labouring woman. It is |
| weeks before the baby is due. | | | | therefore important that you know your birthing |
| Becoming invisible during the whole of the labour is | | | | woman's details (e.g. postcode, date of birth, |
| essential for the birth of any mammal. Farmers | | | | national security/health insurance details), her |
| and vet's know full well that openly watching a | | | | medical history, allergies, time difference between |
| sheep, horse or cow during the birth of their | | | | the contractions, her birthing wishes (natural birth |
| infant will cause major problems to the health and | | | | or types of medication or intervention she does |
| bonding of the mother and the baby both during | | | | doesn't want). |
| and after the birth. The same is true for humans. | | | | So, make sure that you are well fed, well rested, |
| All mamals need privacy during birth because an | | | | calm and happy to be in the birthing room. That is |
| animal that is being watched during such a | | | | your job, nothing more and nothing less. By |
| vulnerable time means that there is a predator | | | | understanding the true importance of doing very |
| around and will increase adrenaline levels in the | | | | little during the whole of the birth process you will |
| mother allowing her to stop or slow down the | | | | be the best partner you can be and will know |
| labour so as to fight or run. | | | | that the birthing woman is having the best |
| When in the birthing room with the labouring | | | | possible chance for a natural and enjoyable birth. |
| woman try and find a discrete corner to sit in out | | | | |